DVD Reviews: February 2006 Archives

Sky High is a very enjoyable comedy that goofs on both superheroes and high school. From the reviews, I recalled the critics panned it, but Rotten Tomatoes gives it a fresh rating of 70%. I think I’d put it on the level of Teen Wolf, which was also set in high school. If you’re a comic book fan, it’s a must-see. The story centers on Will Stronghold, the son of the two most powerful superheroes, the Commander (Kurt Russell) and Jetstream (Kelly Preston). (Russell is one of my favorite actors for his usual steadied and low-key approach to acting, but this is the first time I’ve seen him do anything hammy. Somehow it fits within the character of the Commander, who is a cross between Captain America and Commander Steel.) The film starts on Will’s first day of school at Sky High, a high school for superhero kids that exists on anti-gravity platform in the clouds. Will has a big problem: he hasn’t displayed any paranormal powers to date. The first task upon entry to Sky High is to figure out whether the kids are Heroes or Sidekicks, which is determined by Coach Boomer. Boomer is hilariously played by Bruce Campbell, just one of the many funny supporting actors, which also includes Cloris Leachman, Dave Foley (Mr. Boy, Sidekick teacher) and Kevin McDonald (Mr. Medulla, the mad scientist teacher). Lynda Carter (still lookin’ mighty fine) is cast as Principal Powers.

With only human abilities, Will joins the Sidekick class. There’s a lot of tension between the Sidekicks (who seem like nice geeky kids) and the Heroes (who are the preppy bully types). One of Sky High’s themes is about the cliques in high school: how parents respond to them and how kids respond when one of them moves to another group. Will’s caught in a love triangle between his best friend Layla (a sidekick) and Gwen (a hero). But there are plenty of super-powered belly laughs, especially after Will’s super-strength power is activated in a moment of crisis. There is a speedster bully called Speed, a Mr. Fantastic-like youth called Lash, and a Multiple-Lady cheerleader called Penny. One of my favorite scenes has Will and another hero, Warren Peace (sorry Tolstoy) taking on Speed and Lash in Sky High’s version of the Danger Room. The main villain is called Royal Pain, who has a device called The Pacifier, which turns heroes into babies. She tells the Commander about the plan after he’s in diapers:

My only regret is that this may be the finest supervillian speech ever given…and you don’t even know what I’m saying.

Sky High is a very funny film aimed at a general family audience, but I think it succeeds as a film much better than a lot of comic book translations. Nuff said.

Ultimate Avengers can't possibly match the brilliant graphic novel by Mark Millar and Bryan Hitch, but it does a pretty good job of trying. The movie is aimed at a PG-13 audience, so there are no wife-beating Giant-Men, drunken millionaires, or horny Hulks looking for Betty, although Jarvis still looks a bit gay. The plot follows Millar's outline remarkably close at times, especially with the opening World War 2 sequence involving Captain America (although he doesn't use a gun). Steve Rogers is the main focus, and the film does keep all the bits about being displaced in time. Millar said that when he envisioned the Ultimates, he thought of it as Avengers: The Movie. His introduction of the main characters and the buildup to the first fight would work great in a big budget feature film. Imagine if you had Samuel Jackson (Nick Fury), Tom Cruise (Tony Stark), Brad Pitt (Thor), and Lucy Liu (Janet Van Dyne) all in the same movie? Alas, we don't get the same talent here, as Andre Ware's voice for Nick Fury isn't what I imagined. The animation is what I would call competent, but it's not really as good as most anime or even the Justice League Unlimited series. They did use all of Bryan Hitch's character designs. Iron Man in particular looks so fantastic, I don't know why they wouldn't make an entire TV show around the character.

The plot deviates from the graphic novel in a number of ways besides toning down the adult misbehavior. Iron Man needs to be coerced into joining, which is a bit weird. Bruce Banner's mental deterioration isn't handled as gracefully. The aliens are the main threat, and the Hulk goes berserk after that is over, but he doesn't rampage throughout New York City. There were some great scenes that they could have used: the Hulk knocking Giant-Man into a skyscraper, or Captain America dropping the tank on the Hulk. Why didn't they go for it? I question whether all Ultimates fans will like Ultimate Avengers, but I do think that all longtime Marvel and Avengers fans will be thrilled to see these characters in animated form. Ironically enough, younger viewers may be turned off by the slow buildup to the action. Nuff said.

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I'll have to admit that I only watched Layer Cake because I've read that Daniel Craig will be the new James Bond. It's a good crime caper that deserves to be seen despite Craig's upcoming job, with an interesting plot and a stable of great supporting actors (Colm Meaney, Michael Gambon, and Kenneth Cranham). You'll never know the name of Craig's character, but call him X, a drug dealer who treats crime like a business and wants to cash out. But his boss (Jimmy, played by Cranham) has other plans. Jimmy wants X to find the missing daughter of his friend Eddie (Gambon) and to negotiate a deal for a huge batch of ecstasy. Things get complicated from here…the daughter isn't exactly missing and the ecstasy was stolen from a Dutch crime lord, who dispatches an enforcer to retrieve it. Sienna Miller makes a brief appearance as the girlfriend of a thug, who Craig seduces with his steely blue eyes. Craig is cool, no doubt about it. He reminds a lot of people of Steve McQueen. I think he's terrific in this role and can be an international star. However, when I've showed his picture to several women and told them this would be the new James Bond, they all the same reaction: he's too old! We'll have to see what happens there, but it's an interesting move for the Broccoli's to make. In the meantime, watch Layer Cake if you haven't already seen it. Crime in the UK is much more interesting than our domestic problems. Nuff said.

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I'm a bit behind in watching movies. I hardly ever go to the movie theater anymore and wait for the inevitable DVD release, just to bring down the empire of theatrical chains...no, I'm just too busy or too lazy to go out. This is explains why I've only just seen Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events. I think it's an incredible movie, from the opening faux sequence with the animated Elf to the closing credits. Jim Carrey steals the show, of course, as Count Olaf, as he repeatedly tries to bilk the Baudelaire children (Violet, Klaus and Sunny) out of their inheritance. It's a great role for Carrey, as Olaf is an actor, and dons various disguises to cheat the kids--it's his Peter Sellers moment. This is the darkest story for kids that I've ever seen, involving murder and arson. The photography uses digital grading to promote amber or grey tones throughout the landscape. The set designs are fantastic, from Olaf's dilapidated mansion to Aunt Josphine's rickety house built on a cliff. The actors playing the kids are pretty good, but they don't seem to convey too much emotion, considering the fact that their parents were killed. It's great that Violet is the brainy one. The twins that play Sunny, the baby with teeth that Jaws (from James Bond) would kill for, are the best actors in the whole movie. I've no idea how close this movie is to the books, but I think it works much better than the Harry Potter films. I think it would be tough to make a sequel without recasting all the kids, as they are surely much older by now. Nuff said.

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In the 2001 TV show Undeclared, the character played by Seth Rogan makes this comment about Maxim magazine: "I like Maxim. It's got babes, games, DVDs, sports. It's like it was written just for me!" I feel the same way about director John Stockwell. Stockwell may be the Stanley Kubrick for the Maxim generation. He's two for two now: Blue Crush and Into the Blue, both bikini-clad masterpieces.

I'm watching Into the Blue (Widescreen Edition) on DVD right now. It's got some kind of plot about sunken treasure, but I don't give a shit. It's got Alba, yeah, Jessica Alba, and she is sexy in this one (unlike how I felt about Sin City). There's not a scene where Alba doesn't look Mahhhvellous, as Billy Crystal used to say. The movie takes place in the Bahamas and gives Jessica plenty of reason to run around in thongs and cut-off jeans. Alba's ass deserves its own special MTV award for excellence. Her butt especially looks spectacular in the underwater shots, where the camera hovers above it, like you would if you were diving with her. Stockwell even made the actors free-dive without using scuba gear, just so droogies like us would have a better ass-view. That's just pure fucking genius. The other smart thing is that Paul Walker is also in the movie, so your girlfriend\wife can get off on him. Ashley Scott from the Birds of Prey TV show is also in the flick, and there's a pretty unbelievable shot of her from behind as she sunbathes on a boat. No silicon breasts. Stockwell is an ass man, just like me.

Imagine. Imagine we could end all wars and achieve world peace by air-dropping packages of these DVDs along with Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum. Imagine repressed women around the world shedding those berkas and imitating Alba. Yeah, man, make me the goddamn Secretary of Defense and we'll fight with booze and sex, not bombs. Nuff said.

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